If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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