You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize