allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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