Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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