Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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