so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
it hurts more in the daytime
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
