A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
You coming home soon, man?
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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