I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
