my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
