I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
