he shaved USA in his pubs
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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