I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
lets start a swedish sibling band together
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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