I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize