Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
