Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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