If that was your dad, he is hot
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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