there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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