why didn't you poke me back
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
