Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
This is my gift to your gina
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
