Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
