I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
