Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
