thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize