oh god the rape fog is back!
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
