I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize