he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
