Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
