The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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