I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Michael Bay diarrhea
she looked like the before picture.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
