come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
