she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
