U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize