You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
