Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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