i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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