none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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