They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
you would pick up someone in the library
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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