Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
