This girl is more easily done than said...
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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