we're blogging at a bar
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Randomize
