i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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