yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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