We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
So much rum. So many feels.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Floor bacon is actually really good
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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