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• (858): View more from California

  ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  At the bar in my pajamas again

  (1-541): View more from Oregon

  Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.

  (1-724): View more from Pennsylvania

  hasn't he seen you naked?

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.

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