NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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