Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again http://tfl.nu/hmop
  Replies (9) Good night (4330) Bad night (747)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): 4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens. http://tfl.nu/m8yq
  Replies (55) Good night (10889) Bad night (3464)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot

  (818): View more from California

  god is laughing at you again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot (818): god is laughing at you again http://tfl.nu/4fg3
  Replies (20) Good night (5224) Bad night (1750)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.

  (347): View more from New York

  I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement. (347): I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy. http://tfl.nu/2bcu
  Replies (14) Good night (1311) Bad night (5040)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask http://tfl.nu/g6ag
  Replies (10) Good night (1642) Bad night (3026)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor http://tfl.nu/nslr
  Replies (9) Good night (1988) Bad night (3340)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset http://tfl.nu/cmm6
  Replies (8) Good night (909) Bad night (2288)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I need moral support for this bender

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): I need moral support for this bender http://tfl.nu/bzwm
  Replies (3) Good night (865) Bad night (654)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up http://tfl.nu/ova6
  Replies (3) Good night (555) Bad night (1521)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone. http://tfl.nu/uct6
  Replies (4) Good night (593) Bad night (1265)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache http://tfl.nu/4l2z
  Replies (5) Good night (663) Bad night (1241)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too. http://tfl.nu/y4xc
  Replies (1) Good night (681) Bad night (444)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail. http://tfl.nu/0wm6
  Replies (1) Good night (382) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here? http://tfl.nu/2f90
  Replies (0) Good night (316) Bad night (843)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick http://tfl.nu/y5gq
  Replies (0) Good night (590) Bad night (137)

Randomize