Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
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He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
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Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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