He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
