were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
