There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
i want to swaddle you in tequila
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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