idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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