Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize